WEALTH . HEALTH . LOVE . RELATIONSHIP
Temple Grandin – The Autistic Brain
Exploring the Strength of a Different Kind of Mind
This book is all about looking through an autistic person through the strengths, instead of the deficiency. This book is mind blowing for me as it explores the genetics, the biological brain structure with neuroimaging, on top of cognitive observations to understand more about Autism. The author herself being an autistic child in the 60s, when there was a lack of knowledge of autism, faced all the challenges of living with autism and also a very educational journey for her as she got tremendous support from her mother and her teachers. They went through a path of finding her strength, and the reason behind her behaviours, through science and other areas, instead of just relenting on labels given to the behaviours.
As the book suggests, do not just rely on behaviour observations or a template to determine whether a child is autistic or not. Find out more about the biology of the brain, what has gone abnormal. If there is a deficiency in one area, usually brain supplements with “growing out” on another area, which may lead to a strength – a positive development for a behaviour. Example, most autistic people are highly visual, they can take a look of a design or pattern and can reproduce the design and the details much more than a non-autisti person.
Thich Nhat Hanh – Fear
Essential Wisdom for Getting Through the Storm
Practices for Transforming Fear
“The only way to ease our fear and be truly happy is to acknowledge our fear and look deeply at its source. Instead of trying to escape from our fear, we can invite it up to our awareness and look at it clearly and deeply.”
Awareness is the first step towards change. There are many practical tips described in this book, some of which I personally practice each time fear or doubt hits me. One of which is a very simple but powerful act which immediately brings us peace of mind and the courage to face the fear – it is bringing our mind and senses back to our body, solid on the ground.
Most of the time we are not aware of our physical presence, in the present moment. We worry of the future, or fear from the past experiences, and when it gets too overwhelmed, we do not know how to bring ourselves back to present and start to panic. One of the most effective way, is to take a deep breath and bring our focus, and awareness back to our feet on the ground, our sense of present moment – where we can restore our peace and sense of security. Without which our mind is going to go wild with the thoughts and emotions arise.
There are many other practices – gentle, easy to follow, compassion steps towards gaining peace and restoring our courage to face our fear and transform them. Only through acknowledging our fear, then can we move forward in life by transforming them – looking at them with peace instead of letting them take control of us.
Dr. Alexander Elder – Trading For A Living
My Inspired Creative Living – Knowledge is Power, Create Your Possibilities through Abundance, not Fear.
Five years ago I started my journey into wealth management, and explored many seminars and courses. I must admit that I fell into the trap of engaging into something out of fear. When some “guru” told me “grab this opportunity now, I’m increasing the price” and I jumped right into it, it turned out to be disastrous – not something that is suitable to my style and hence couldn’t co-create the results that I wanted. Eventually I took a calmer approach to observe, read more and took actions on my knowledge and asked appropriate questions, I created results for the past two years, and am learning more and more in the process. I liken my experience to a paragraph in this book – Chapter 6 Market Gurus:
“Many people give lip service to their wish for freedom and independence. When they come under pressure, they change their tune and start looking for “strong leadership.” Traders in distress often seek directions from assorted gurus. When I was growing up in the former Soviet Union, children were taught that Stalin was our great leader. Later we found out what a monster he had been, but while he was alive, most people enjoyed following the leader. He freed them from the need to think for themselves. “Little Stalins” were installed in every area of society – in economics, biology, architecture, and so on. .. The fantasy that someone else can make you rich… ”
So next time you think you’d like to follow a guru, first be aware of what you want to create for yourself, or is it an expectation that the same results could be yours if you simply follow? Ask questions from the “gurus” about how to achieve your targets, if they brush it away, do you know why? Are there signs of ego talk of “don’t bother me with your silly questions” or “hot selling and pushing” for decisions from you instead of helping you with some of your concerns. These are signs of fear, selling fear. Adjust your target and plan if you need to. Gain clarity over the process and not rush into it. Somewhere down the path ahead, you’ve got to create your own path and plan, because only then can you act with clear intention and follow through.
I would like to quote a paragraph from the book his thoughts on “Get Rich Slowly” –
An amateur trying to get rich quick is like a monkey out on a thin branch. He reaches for a ripe fruit but crashes when the branch breaks under his weight.
This book shares very down to earth, sometimes blunt but straightforward way to tell you how you can train your psychology to the best of your life, not just in trading, with the following highlight:
- always know what works best for you – what is your psychology, your patience, your behaviour, and what styles suit you best.
- use your intelligence – information is knowledge when you have applied it and learn from it.
- be frugal and prudent – conscious of your actions, why do you do it, and what goals you are aiming for yourself, not others’ way of life, but your very own targets.
- manage your money, your risk and your psychology. And I believe this applies to personal life management too.
The next time you create a goal, say “I want to have a 3-storey house!”, start working backwards from this goal, and define the steps how to get there. Without a plan, we plan to fail. And jumping on the next big thing, thinking it will get us straight to the goal, we may crash without any substantial support and purpose. Know what are you aiming at, why do you do it, why do you save it for, your fulfilment, your psychology and then act consciously.
Robin Sharma – Life Lessons From The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari
“The technique is a simple one and involves nothing more than selecting a phrase that you will train your mind to focus on at different times throughout the day until it begins to dominate your awareness and reshape the person you are. If it is inner peace and calm you seek, the phrase known as a mantra, might be, ‘I am so grateful that I am a serene and tranquil person.’ …
Repeat your mantra softly under your breath as you walk to work, as you wait in line or as you wash the dishes… for at least four weeks. The results will be profound as you take one giant step to finding the peace, prosperity and purpose your life requires. As Hazrat Inayat Khan said, ‘The words that enlighten the soul are more precious than jewels.'”.
I personally have practiced this and experienced profound impact. There was this period of time of about 3 months when I started my coaching sessions and needed motivation to strive on, I started a routine of morning walks of about 30minutes, playing songs of inspired words and repeating the songs as I take the walk. After doing this repeatedly every day for 3 months, the words stick in my mind and till today whenever I hear these songs, I straighten up and immediately switch to a motivated, alert mode that I had those mornings and this pushes me further and supports my actions.
Louise Hay – You Can Heal Your Life
Most of physical illnesses are a result of emotional illnesses. All that resentment, pain, lack of love, rejection, etc embeds in our cells and causes destruction. For example, breasts cancer is a result of over bearing, giving out too much in naturing others, and cancer is an accumulation of too much resentment. Well the saying doesn’t go without proof – Happiness is the best medicine! Very often we see a happy person without illnesses. The author is a living proof of what she teaches – she recovered from cancer with her own methods. And now she teaches worldwide this phenomenal philosophy. It is about being conscious of your thoughts, it creates your reality. It is not about abandoning medicine or ignoring science, but co-create your reality by being part of it – your thoughts. I read this book and practiced it, recovering my years of dis-ease with two illnesses.[/accordion_toggle]
Deepak Chopra – The Path To Love
When I got out of my divorce and a few more failed relationships, I was disillusioned with relationships. Lack of self esteem, and totally lost in how to manage, including all the emotional turmoil. This book helps to put it more systematically – the seven stages of love. It has helped me to calm down the emotions and look at relationships in perspective – Love Oneself, and Discover the aspects of Love within one’s own life, before extending the love relationship to other areas.
Vladimir Megre – Co-Creation
Mind blowing… One of its kind, I’ve never read such kind of books before – you can’t really decide if it is a fiction or non-fiction. It says, if you believe Anastasia exists, then it is non-fiction. It is up to your mind. This is book 4 of a series of 9 books by the Russian writer, Vladimir Megre. He challenged us to try to live a life of pure joy and regain our truth, our most basic creation as a Man on earth. It is thought provoking.
Harville Hendrix – Receiving Love
My mentor Carina Hagstrom, recommended this book to me in one of our consultation. I think for women who has a low self esteem, this should be the first step – Receiving Love. Instead of jumping eagerly into finding the love relationships, first ask oneself, have I got the love I have for myself? Are you in rejection of your self? I started then to examine my childhood relationships, and check the wounds for healing… why was there a quick to anger, and the negativity, and how to manage the conflicts when it arises within a couple relationship. A practical and useful read.